I would like my life to be disciplined enough to be a point that even my time for breaks and time for calling and remembering people is decided and fixed. I really would like it to be like that. Matter of fact, I have even lived like that and I did not miss anything or found anything to be wrong. But I wont do it. Because the people around me do not like me like that. They like me to pick up calls when they call me, not just in the time window meant for picking up calls. They want me to talk to them at 3 in the morning if they are sad and want to share something. They want me to walk with them if they want company. They want things that definitely ruins my schedule, but I feel happy to do it.
It is true that I like my life to be well defined and structured. Not completely planned, but structured. However I don’t mind to break the structure for people I love, people I care for and people who care for me. It is the very assurance that you will be there when they need you that makes life possible. If we all had a time schedule to work, a time schedule to help, to care, to just walk with someone, we will end up with a more structured but less human, life. I am pretty sure that one day when I feel like sharing some thing to someone the last thing I would like to see is a “Closed for today” board hanging on everybody’s neck. Its the feeling of availability that makes you feel good.
Its that feeling of availability that assures you that when you are out on the road at the middle of the night or up from sleep at 3 in the morning, there will be someone who will arrange something to pick you up, there will be someone who will pick up the call.
It is for this availability that people fall in love. It is for this availability that people have close friends and it is for this availability that people some times even earn lot and spend money hiring people to serve them. They all desire for it, some get it from love, some from money, some from friendship, but we all get happy just by the thought, that we have it.
There are always some people who would come up and say that they like to live a solitary life. I have said that many time. Its not that these people always lie. But just a little bit of availability from other people makes their life worth living. Of course with availability comes the obvious con of expecting people to be available. And that is always the cause of distress in even the strongest of bonds. But then what fun is dinner if its all sweet. A little bit of spice makes it more palatable and that is exactly the way in which these distresses should be considered.
In short what we call bond among people, the bond of love, friendship or even the bonds of money like your cook, your employee and also the bond with animals and the bond with machines like your computer, or your simple ceiling fan can all be somewhere broken down into one major factor making them all strong – availability. Being a software engineer, availability is a term that we are well familiar with; but only associated with your website being up all the time and things like that. Had I known back then that it extends outside to everything around you, I would have certainly seen and done things in a whole new and different way.
Its not accepted by everyone when you break down something considered to be so complex as the feeling of a bond to something so simple, something which is just one word. But now it looks obvious enough to me, that the bonds we talk about so passionately and the things which make us happy are all just a matter of availability.