The first has to be Birthdays. This is one kind of celebration that goes back to your childhood when you do not have the verbal mastery to debate and prove to your parents that Birthday celebrations look stupid, utterly stupid. My dad was very obsessed with my birthday, and why should he not be – I was born that day. He used to decorate the whole house and invite more people than what the house and our finances could hold.
However I secretly always pondered over the purpose of all that. They all celebrated and sang for me, as if being born a couple of years from then, on that day, was something I was planning for years and finally could accomplish with marvelously flying colors. They greet you as if I myself, had caused my birth. I honestly believe that if they do want to celebrate my birthday – the purpose of which is also unclear as I was not like the guy who theorized space-time continuum or the man who liberated them from some tyrannous clutches – they should congratulate my parents. They did all the stuff, they are the ones who are responsible for me to happen, they are the ones who had sex. I should be made to cut the cake, feed it to them and bow with respect for making me happen. I understand if my parents are glad for getting a child, but the others should totally be like “Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. P, you have made a wonderful kid.”
Even the people who tell me that they celebrate because it is the day I – a wonderful friend, or the guy who helped them sometime, or something else – was born; even they should be thanking my parents. I mean I understand celebrating my birthday, but I think I should not be the one getting the credits here.
On a kind of a similar note, there is this other celebration in which I should be the one getting the credits but I don’t. It is the one, when you achieve something, like passing an examination, getting a job, or becoming a parent. I don’t know how this is celebrated throughout the world but in our place it is celebrated by distributing sweets to neighbors, friends, colleagues and sometimes even acquaintances.
Why? Why am I giving them sweets? I studied hard and I gave the exam to pass it; I being good at my academics got a job after I cracked the interview, I will be the one to have sex, for a baby to come and for me to become a parent. Should they not be giving me sweets, for my efforts? I mean, think about the poor child who in spite of having a very bad financial background, and no proper facilities, earned a great score in his exams. What does he have to do now? Tell his parents they need to shell out more money so that he can go around giving sweets.
People will throw points such as, these are the moments in which you make other people happy by giving them sweets or throwing a party or sometimes both; so that you can share your joy. So that people will pray for more such days to come, which, in turn, is beneficial for you.
Well let me argue on that point.
I think a man will be more happy if there are people, who care about him, knocking on his door, with sweets in their hand, when he achieves something; than he giving it out to others.
People do all this, to widen their circles, and as a bribe for others to keep wanting more such days which in turn will mean progress for them. This is not a conscious attempt to bribe, but there is a subconscious, telepathic bribe exchanged at such events. And you cannot stop doing these, because we don’t live in a perfect society where relations are easily formed without vested interests. And so we continue to feed those imperfections in our favor by such ceremonies.
I know I am being a very harsh critic to something which looks so pleasant, but that does not mean I am going to stop doing it. Let go of all the imperfections such celebrations imply, and I too like to have a reason to celebrate; but to speak out what I feel is more crucial a need for me than having fun.
- 9. (Birthdays) (munkysox.wordpress.com)